Sympathy, Knowledge and Poise

Sympathy, Knowledge and Poise seem to be the three ingredients that are

most needed in forming the Gentle Man. I place these elements according

to their value. No man is great who does not have Sympathy plus, and the

greatness of men can be safely gauged by their sympathies. Sympathy and

imagination are twin sisters. Your heart must go out to all men, the

high, the low, the rich, the poor, the learned, the unlearned, the good,

the bad, the wise and the foolish--it is necessary to be one with them

all, else you can never comprehend them. Sympathy!--it is the touchstone

to every secret, the key to all knowledge, the open sesame of all

hearts. Put yourself in the other man's place and then you will know why

he thinks certain things and does certain deeds. Put yourself in his

place and your blame will dissolve itself into pity, and your tears will

wipe out the record of his misdeeds. The saviors of the world have

simply been men with wondrous sympathy.

But Knowledge must go with Sympathy, else the emotions will become

maudlin and pity may be wasted on a poodle instead of a child; on a

field-mouse instead of a human soul. Knowledge in use is wisdom, and

wisdom implies a sense of values--you know a big thing from a little

one, a valuable fact from a trivial one. Tragedy and comedy are simply

questions of value: a little misfit in life makes us laugh, a great one

is tragedy and cause for expression of grief.

Poise is the strength of body and strength of mind to control your

Sympathy and your Knowledge. Unless you control your emotions they run

over and you stand in the mire. Sympathy must not run riot, or it is

valueless and tokens weakness instead of strength. In every hospital for

nervous disorders are to be found many instances of this loss of

control. The individual has Sympathy but not Poise, and therefore his

life is worthless to himself and to the world.

He symbols inefficiency and not helpfulness. Poise reveals itself more

in voice than it does in words; more in thought than in action; more in

atmosphere than in conscious life. It is a spiritual quality, and is

felt more than it is seen. It is not a matter of bodily size, nor of

bodily attitude, nor attire, nor of personal comeliness: it is a state

of inward being, and of knowing your cause is just. And so you see it is

a great and profound subject after all, great in its ramifications,

limitless in extent, implying the entire science of right living. I once

met a man who was deformed in body and little more than a dwarf, but who

had such Spiritual Gravity--such Poise--that to enter a room where he

was, was to feel his presence and acknowledge his superiority. To allow

Sympathy to waste itself on unworthy objects is to deplete one's life

forces. To conserve is the part of wisdom, and reserve is a necessary

element in all good literature, as well as in everything else.

Poise being the control of our Sympathy and Knowledge, it implies a

possession of these attributes, for without having Sympathy and

Knowledge you have nothing to control but your physical body. To

practise Poise as a mere gymnastic exercise, or study in etiquette, is

to be self-conscious, stiff, preposterous and ridiculous. Those who cut

such fantastic tricks before high heaven as make angels weep, are men

void of Sympathy and Knowledge trying to cultivate Poise. Their science

is a mere matter of what to do with arms and legs. Poise is a question

of spirit controlling flesh, heart controlling attitude.

Get Knowledge by coming close to Nature. That man is the greatest who

best serves his kind. Sympathy and Knowledge are for use--you acquire

that you may give out; you accumulate that you may bestow. And as God

has given unto you the sublime blessings of Sympathy and Knowledge,

there will come to you the wish to reveal your gratitude by giving them

out again; for the wise man is aware that we retain spiritual qualities

only as we give them away. Let your light shine. To him that hath shall

be given. The exercise of wisdom brings wisdom; and at the last the

infinitesimal quantity of man's knowledge, compared with the Infinite,

and the smallness of man's Sympathy when compared with the source from

which ours is absorbed, will evolve an abnegation and a humility that

will lend a perfect Poise. The Gentleman is a man with perfect Sympathy,

Knowledge, and Poise.